Hopes and Heroes

Summer has been so good to me.

Not only have I had several great spiritual experiences–the best yet to come–but it was a time of relaxation, free from stress. I didn’t feel pressured to do anything in particular, no doubt due to the absence of my saxophone lessons that are always hanging over my head, and I felt that although I wasted a LOT of time doing nothing, I accomplished a lot, too.

For instance.

Today I made good headway on this essay I’ve been working on practically the entire summer. Call it silly, if you must, but it is really important to me to make a good first impression for what I expect to be my favorite class next year. It’s a typical prompt–Why Do I Want To Take Honors English–but I think I’ve done something brilliant with it. If nothing else, my dedication shows that when it comes to writing, nothing is below me. I enjoy it that much (but really I’m just dying to have something to write, seeing as I can’t think of any creative ideas of my own). After I add the finishing touches, I’ll send it off into the world.

Also, I tweaked my piano composition. I think I have it the way I want it, now. Or… actually, nevermind. I need to fill out the chords in the right hand at the key modulation, but other than that I’m pretty proud of my effort. Last time at my piano lessons, I figured out how to navigate Finale a bit easier, so I’m anxious to get working on it again. Transcribe it, I mean. I have it all composed and everything. I’m really, r e a l l y, excited that I finished something musically compositiony (Ha! so much for English skills) for the first time… ever, in my life. Although I can’t quite seem to name it. Got any ideas for titles? I’m in the market.

Anyway.

Last night I was sitting on my bed, thinking about anything and everything that could procrastinate my actually having to fall asleep–and I was thinking about crushes. I know, I know. Soooo typical. BUT ACTUALLY I was thinking about how I’m not so typical, in that what is considered a “crush” for me is simply me admiring someone for specific qualities that I’d like to have more of, and definately go on my “MY DREAM HUSBAND NEEDS TO BE…” list.

For example.

One of my semi-crushes-that’s-not-really-a-crush-because-that-would-be-r e a l l y-weird-with-this-particular-person, I admire because he is so easy to talk to. Really, I don’t ever have to think “what should I say?” around him because I know that he will not judge a single word to come out of my mouth (Okay, so he might laugh at me. But it ends up in a conversation, so it’s just teasing). Also, he’s really intelligent, and he and I are insanely competitive. Actually, scratch that. I’M insanely competitive, and he is so passive about it he finds my intense take-ons hilarious. On top of that, he is spiritually converted, I can see that. He knows where he’s going (on a mission, and then to the temple) and he knows how to live in order to prepare for that. It’s really quite admirable, and for that he is one of my heroes.

Also.

Another friend I have I admire because he is color blind. Not literally color blind, but that he is non-judgemental, and it’s not even a chore for him. It’s a characteristic, not something he’s ever had to work on. I wish I were more like that, because with certain people I have to really, really try to be kind to (and sometimes I don’t even do that). With him, he is so genuinely caring, and considerate. He also has the best sense of humor of all my friends, and so everyone likes to be around him. Plus, he’s sweet. Earlier this summer he emailed all of us (friends) saying he’d like to put together some summer parties/activities, and he gave some ideas and asked for feedback. One of his suggestions was hiking the Y, and to that I replied that I’d be up for it, but he probably wouldn’t want me to come because I would go too slow. His answer came back: “Brittney, if it meant you could come with us, I would carry you up the mountain.” For that he is my hero.

And a third.

This one… is the closest to an actual “crush” because I’m kind of admiring from afar, here, but he’s just so cute! Inside and out. I first looked up to him because of his musical talent, being a crazy good trumpet player and whatnot. Also, his intelligence. Valedictorian, 35 ACT, 4.7 G.P.A…. yeah. But really, I like how he is genuine. If you remember, that’s my biggest thing right now, and so I naturally look out for people I can model myself on to become genuine myself. And so, I have another.

And then I put all that together and realized, I want to marry my hero.

Doesn’t that have a nice ring to it? My hero… my husband… It just makes me smile with anticipation. I can’t wait to meet my hero, and then marry him in the temple (!). By the way, does it scare anyone else that I could be married in less than 5 years?! Four. To be exact. (Insert scream here).

Anyway, like I said. My life is fantastic. I did eventually go to sleep, and I awoke this morning feeling rather disappointed that I couldn’t remember the dream I had. With my song done, my essay done, my summer camps through… I’m ready for school to start! But…. I guess I could wait a couple more weeks. Youth Conference on Friday! And then a family reunion the weekend after that. I have a feeling I’ll be plenty busy.

Until the time next…